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  1. #1021
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    Quote Originally Posted by pavt View Post
    "... we have found the enema, and he is us!"
    Walt Kelly? Izzat you?

    I need a billing address.

    Coffee spewed across the keyboard thing. it only LOOKS like a enema gone impatient...

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  3. #1022
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bobw View Post
    Up for a ground Habanero story?

    In my younger days, 23 or 24, I walked home from the bar with a nice glow on,
    crappy apartment 3rd floor, but it had a decent bar down the street.

    I was hungry, so I decided to make some quick and dirty Chili, the brown
    stuff, no Chile.. The good stuff.

    2 frozen hamburger pattys, some chopped up onion, a glug of salsa, a can of beans, garlic, cumin,
    and the topper, ground habanero, just a tiny tiny little bit, not much more than
    the size of a lentil, but definitely smaller than a pea.

    So as my concoction is simmering, I sit down on the couch in my underwear and as
    any drunk guy sitting in his underwear does, I scratched my nuts..

    A few minutes later... things started getting warm, and then they started
    getting hot and then they started to hurt... And somewhere along the line I must
    have rubbed my eye.. My eye started watering and hurting, so I rubbed it again, and
    got some more chile in the other eye...

    Long story short, I spent 45 minutes curled up in the corner of the shower crying waiting
    for the pain to die down..

    Not one of my finer moments.. Though I did learn a lesson.. I still ate the chili and
    it was pretty good.
    F**k's sake. I'm running out of KEYBOARDS!

    Once sliced-up several POUNDS of fresh and juicy Habanero to go into a jug with a bottle of Dry Sack sherry. Used to them, so did it bare-handed, not gloved.

    No real pain. I did say "used to?" But the hands looked like bright red HV lineman's inner liner gloves being air-pressure-tested for pinhole leaks!

    I managed not to NEED to piss!

    Sugars neutralize capsaicin. Water, not so much.

    It's a benzene-ring "type" of thing, similar to Cocaine.

    Lactose works.

    Never wondered why Thai iced coffee is one third or so condensed milk? Flush with milk, syrup, or honey, next "accident", or grab a packet of sugar if it is in the mouth.

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  5. #1023
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    Quote Originally Posted by kustomizingkid View Post
    I'm stoked that a 65 year old on Practical Machinist knows more about Post Malone than I do hahaha. This thread rules.

    Well, I just saw a Dorito's commercial last night with him on it.
    IDK if that is new, or I just didn't know who (what?) that was, but I now have a better understanding.


    --------------------

    I am Ox and I approve this h'yah post!

  6. #1024
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bobw View Post
    Up for a ground Habanero story?

    In my younger days, 23 or 24, I walked home from the bar with a nice glow on,
    crappy apartment 3rd floor, but it had a decent bar down the street.

    I was hungry, so I decided to make some quick and dirty Chili, the brown
    stuff, no Chile.. The good stuff.

    2 frozen hamburger pattys, some chopped up onion, a glug of salsa, a can of beans, garlic, cumin,
    and the topper, ground habanero, just a tiny tiny little bit, not much more than
    the size of a lentil, but definitely smaller than a pea.

    So as my concoction is simmering, I sit down on the couch in my underwear and as
    any drunk guy sitting in his underwear does, I scratched my nuts..

    A few minutes later... things started getting warm, and then they started
    getting hot and then they started to hurt... And somewhere along the line I must
    have rubbed my eye.. My eye started watering and hurting, so I rubbed it again, and
    got some more chile in the other eye...

    Long story short, I spent 45 minutes curled up in the corner of the shower crying waiting
    for the pain to die down..

    Not one of my finer moments.. Though I did learn a lesson.. I still ate the chili and
    it was pretty good.
    I used to get up in the middle of the night and snack on pickled jalapenos, that is how I learned that I scratch my nuts in my sleep. As for habaneros, two years ago I lost what looked like a good crop to worms. Growing stuff here is a pita compared to any place else I lived, but worms eating hot peppers? As for AS9100, his last activity is shown as Sept 20th, he must be contemplating posting something.

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  8. #1025
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    Quote Originally Posted by triumph406 View Post
    ...make it home with his Johnson, ball sack and regional skin intact, and can take a shower to get the rest of the Lysol off.

    By some miracle his wife didn't notice.

    That wasn't the craziest story he had.
    Craziest thing to do with Johnsons-not-the-wax I've ever heard didn't happen but ONCE. It made the news TWICE.

    A married Hong Kong Chinese guy finding out his wife was cheating on him.

    And cutting-off his OWN penis. Not that of the other guy.


    I can't fathon how this was intended to disappoint the consumer if said consumer already had another supplier. Talk about a wife who wouldn't "notice?"

    But I DID say "Hong Kong Chinese?", so chalk it up to "cultural differences" yah?

    I mean.. usually they are just folks, and not always as "prudish" as they claim, either?


  9. #1026
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bobw View Post
    Up for a ground Habanero story?

    In my younger days, 23 or 24, I walked home from the bar with a nice glow on,
    crappy apartment 3rd floor, but it had a decent bar down the street.

    I was hungry, so I decided to make some quick and dirty Chili, the brown
    stuff, no Chile.. The good stuff.

    2 frozen hamburger pattys, some chopped up onion, a glug of salsa, a can of beans, garlic, cumin,
    and the topper, ground habanero, just a tiny tiny little bit, not much more than
    the size of a lentil, but definitely smaller than a pea.

    So as my concoction is simmering, I sit down on the couch in my underwear and as
    any drunk guy sitting in his underwear does, I scratched my nuts..

    A few minutes later... things started getting warm, and then they started
    getting hot and then they started to hurt... And somewhere along the line I must
    have rubbed my eye.. My eye started watering and hurting, so I rubbed it again, and
    got some more chile in the other eye...

    Long story short, I spent 45 minutes curled up in the corner of the shower crying waiting
    for the pain to die down..

    Not one of my finer moments.. Though I did learn a lesson.. I still ate the chili and
    it was pretty good.
    Sitting across the back-yard bar from my buddy Frankie, we are cuttin' and choppin' stuff for the weekends BBQ.
    I believe I was cuttin' up taters for salad, Frankie was dicing jalapenos (for everything, LOL). We are rippin' on each other as we always do.
    I crack a witty one that sticks pretty good, and he whips his knife around as if to point it at me in a "now you listen here!" manner, well,,,,,,,,
    Drop of jalapeno juice slides off the tip of the knife and flies straight in me eye-hole!
    He got the last laugh that day.

    But wait, there are worse things that can happen!
    Some friends and I, way back in the day (early 90's) used to bar-hop on our dirt bikes. We would park them in the dark where the po-po couldn't see them.
    And, in typical "biker" fashion, when we were leaving, there had to be a show. One night, last stop before we would all head to Bartone's truck-stop on 6N for steak & eggs, somebody decided it would be funny to steal a bunch of gas-caps. Of course, as we leave we all leave on one wheel. And, we all get laps full of Sunoco 94 and Maxima 927 @ 40:1. We did not enjoy steak & eggs that night. I feel sorry for Billy as he had to ride the tracks all the way to Fairview!

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  11. #1027
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    This thread has become the repository (suppository?) for "unusual" comments and situations. So, Ladies and Germs, I present to you:

    Vietnam police seize 345,000 used condoms that were sold as new - CNN

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    Quote Originally Posted by Milland View Post
    This thread has become the repository (suppository?) for "unusual" comments and situations. So, Ladies and Germs, I present to you:

    Vietnam police seize 345,000 used condoms that were sold as new - CNN
    LMAO.

    I especially like the last line:
    Neither she[detainee] nor the owner of the warehouse were available for comment.
    Talk about an awkward conversation.......


    ETA: To do my part, here's one for Gordon's benefit.....

    lego.jpg

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  14. #1029
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    richard-king.jpg

    Something not worthy of starting a thread over but well worthy of this dumpster fire, ran into Richard King at the airport last month.

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    Another habanero tale, from yesterday and this morning:

    My favorite little madman (not quite two and a half) was eating a quesadilla his mother made for him for lunch yesterday. It was slow going so I decided to give him a flavor blast with a couple drips of habanero sauce, knowing that the tiny maniac likes spicy food*. He bites it, proclaims "ooooh, 'picy! Henry drink water!" He ate the rest in record time.

    This morning, I asked what he wanted for breakfast, and he proudly declared that he wanted "eggies with sausage, and spicy hot sauce. No cheese!" My man.

    *we order his Thai food mild, from a place that doesn't mess around. We warn people to order one level down from what they're used to. The first time she did it, I gave my wife that funny look and asked "who is the mild one for?" as she had forgotten that "no spice" is the option usually ordered for one year olds.

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  18. #1031
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    Default I can make it worse for you...

    I can make it worse for you...

    Japanese man, 22, cooks his own genitals and serves them to paying dinner party guests | Daily Mail Online

    pics or it didn't happen.... right? Thankfully there are no pics for that one.

  19. #1032
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    Quote Originally Posted by ChipSplitter View Post
    LMAO.

    I especially like the last line:

    Talk about an awkward conversation.......
    Heck with that - I want to know who the "individual" is who was supplying all the used condoms!

    Talk about one busy chappy (and "chapped" would be the issue). But at least, you wouldn't call him the Father of the Country, would you??

  20. #1033
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    Quote Originally Posted by pavt View Post
    I can make it worse for you...

    Japanese man, 22, cooks his own genitals and serves them to paying dinner party guests | Daily Mail Online

    pics or it didn't happen.... right? Thankfully there are no pics for that one.
    I can't decide what the strangest part of that story is... I am also having bad memories of a paragraph in a book I read talking about eunuch slaves. Hopefully he is satisfied with his, pee hole?

  21. #1034
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    Quote Originally Posted by kustomizingkid View Post
    I can't decide what the strangest part of that story is... I am also having bad memories of a paragraph in a book I read talking about eunuch slaves. Hopefully he is satisfied with his, pee hole?
    Pretty sure that "he" is now a "she" since this famous chef was using the proceeds to fund the operation much like Caitlin Jenner

  22. #1035
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    Quote Originally Posted by pavt View Post
    Pretty sure that "he" is now a "she" since this famous chef was using the proceeds to fund the operation much like Caitlin Jenner
    Nope. Read the article again. Asexual, not trans, not gay, not interested in sex.

    I assume the operation was just to get rid of those inconvenient dangly bits that he had no use for.

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  24. #1037
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    Mr. King, maybe you could post up some sort of update per the issue so that I can justify not locking this?
    Even if you have to make sumpthing up?

    IDK how long I dare leave this quite this open?


    ----------------

    I am Ox and I approve this h'yah post!

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  26. #1038
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    Some weird turns of the worm seen here for sure.
    What was the original ask?

  27. #1039
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ox View Post
    Mr. King, maybe you could post up some sort of update per the issue so that I can justify not locking this?
    Even if you have to make sumpthing up?

    IDK how long I dare leave this quite this open?


    ----------------

    I am Ox and I approve this h'yah post!
    Sure! New kid started Monday. 25yrs/old. Food service background. Seems like a real good kid. Just wants to work, and not with food, LOL.
    Full-grown stalky dude, no issues crankin' torque wrenches. Good eye-sight. Good hearing. And, definitely sober!
    When I asked him if he wanted the job his reply was "Yes, please!". Going over his schedule, just to confirm you do want 40hrs/wk right?
    Again, "Yes, please!". Has showed up on time every day. Works steady all day. He is catching on pretty quick. I have only seen his phone one time.
    He starts at 10am. He was here about 9:52 ready to rock, looked like he was answering a text. That is the only time I have seen the phone. Perfect!
    Yesterday was a little rough. He miss-loaded a couple parts. One took out a $500 saw. The other took two 3/8" S-carbs and two SK16 collets.
    I expect these happenings. It is part of training. I'm not discouraged at all. He is doing really well.
    Especially since he has no "mechanical" experience whatsoever of any kind. He has pretty good dexterity. Doesn't drop everything (like Tommy used to).
    And, takes direction well. he says he likes it. I think I may have a good one here. We shall see if he still likes it in 3 months come evaluation/raise time.

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  29. #1040
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    Quote Originally Posted by wheelieking71 View Post
    ,,,
    Yesterday was a little rough. He miss-loaded a couple parts. One took out a $500 saw. The other took two 3/8" S-carbs and two SK16 collets.
    I expect these happenings. It is part of training. I'm not discouraged at all. He is doing really well.
    ....
    An so it starts and so good for you to eat this costs for a new guy. Some bosses would be kill the new guy,
    No one does it right at first.
    Bob

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